When it comes to housekeeping it feels like I go one step forward and ten steps back. I was raised by a clean-freak, and I suppose some of my slobbishness comes from rebelling at the way I was raised. However, some of it is surely in my genes. My mother… I won’t go there. My stepmom and my mother are like night and day. (If you’re into astrology, Mom’s a Sagittarius and Reba’s a Gemini. You do the math.) The way my stepmom raised me, I at least know what real clean looks like; I just wish the learning process hadn’t left me so neurotic.
That said, I would like better control over my life, obviously. Or, at least I like to think I do. And one of the areas in which I need to exert greater control is how I organize my home. The “shell” of my home, the building itself and the neighborhood surrounding it, are not much to speak of–and I can’t make them any better, this is a rental and making the neighborhood better would require mastery of mind control. Not gonna happen. But I can make what’s inside my apartment (what belongs to me, anyway) work out better.
I am trying to come to terms with just how much has to go. I just have so much crap lying around that I originally meant to use, and usually did use, but then left idle for far too long. If I’m not going to use it then it needs to go. No amount of “but this is useful! but I could make money with this!” is going to help. If I was gonna, I would have by now. I haven’t, so it’s got to go, better luck next time.
I’ve been thinking about this and, I love crafts. I love making stuff, I just don’t get around to it anymore because most of what interests me is not fit for my daughter to play with yet and I don’t want to get it out with her awake because she would get upset. It is simply not worth it. So I thought about this, and I guess the one craft I could focus on right now and not make a big mess of it, nor endanger my child’s safety, would be scrapbooking. I don’t mean that elaborate stuff like my best friend Dawn gets up to, but simply organizing my photos and doing something nice with them.
You don’t want to know how many used rolls of film I have knocking around here that desperately need developing. Realistically, I know I’m not going to get much out of them. I’ll be lucky to have saved any images at all, frankly. But I found a cheap developer I can work with, and little by little I’ll get this done.
Meanwhile all the other craft stuff needs to go. I haven’t done anything with it in months, I don’t have proper storage for it and it’s just taking up space.
I’m thinking about letting my art supplies go too. I hate to say it. I just… I have some sketchy technical skill (ha ha, pardon the pun) but no real creativity to speak of. At least, I don’t think I have any. Well, let’s put it this way, if I was going to do something meaningful with it I would have by now. I’m tired of hoarding art supplies and doing nothing with them. Even if I’ve got the talent, I don’t have to be an artist. I am allowed not to be. I can even, hey, guess what, put it off for now and go be an artist later. It’s all good.
Old baby clothes have to go. Also my old clothes that I don’t want or that don’t fit me.
Books have to go. I hear some of my audience gasping in outrage. You know what? Too bad. I’ll never read half the ones on my shelves. I can go to the library for the rest. There’s valuing the printed word, and there’s hoarding. I hoard too much. I need to get out of the habit. Like, yesterday.
I’m debating how much of this I should unload on Freecycle and how much I should try to get money back out of. Sorry for the dangling whatever-part-of-speech-that-is. The jewelry supplies ought to sell for a good little bit. The art supplies too, I would imagine. The rest… I just don’t know.
The one thing I’ve done consistently all this time and stuck with was writing. Second-most consistent was photography. I think if I stick with those a while and see where they lead me, I might be OK. But I can’t go scattering my energy to the four winds and expect to come out the other side as an effective person. It just doesn’t work.
When I get the extraneous stuff out of the way, then we can talk about organizing the rest. God, I hope this doesn’t take me another five years.